On Rainy Days

Its hard to tell whats coming down my face: raindrops or tears.

I'm scared of being alone, I honestly am. Its my biggest fear. With everything that's been happening lately, the fearing is just inches away from being real. I'm trying my hardest to not think like that, but I'm reminded of it everyday.....

Constants are:

Disappointment and loneliness..........

my dysfunctional family just got even worse...

Most likely

I will end up watching the following on my laptop: Youth In Revolt, Sherlock Holmes, The Fourth Kind, and probably some others....apparently I can't find anyone to watch it with..at least within a feasible radius.

Fast forward

Wow the last couple of days were just coming at me pretty fast. Thursday- I don't really remember much. Just remember that Hohyung made some pad see ew that was pretty good and we had alot to drink after, to the point were I got drunk. Friday- Didn't really do much, hanged out with Akhil and Emily! Got dinner and chilled at Akhil's place for a while. It was nice hanging out with them. Saturday- Hiked up to the C with Akhil, Emily and her friend and friend's friends. Extremely chill and fun. Got back when the sun was setting. Chowed down on some burgers, chilled at the pool and jacuzzi. After that, we played some drinking games at their place. Met some cool people. Awesome time besides the part where I just got emotional. Sunday- I knocked out at their place and slept there for the night. Went to Coco's for brunch and just watched tv all day with them.

This weekend was pretty fun....as fun as when I went out to get Kbbq with my old friends. I miss that being that fun and happy

Shots...

haven't filled this emptiness inside of me. My face, my jaw, my teeth, and my limbs go numb yet the pain is still there...If anything, it just brings up the emptiness even more. I don't even like drinking that much. I just do it, because it beats doing nothing most of the time..

Most likely

I'm just blind and deaf to this situation. Not noticing the signs that you give off. I guess its fine for you, but I'm just stuck in the past.....a fool just stuck in the past..

Hmmm

Coke and crown royal is good. Its addicting.....